The following exchange was dutifully recorded during the social which followed last year's ONB Annual General Meeting, somewhere just south of Fredericton proper.
Police: Good evening, are you the host?
Host: No.
Police: We've been getting complaints about this party.
Host: About the drugs?
Police: No.
Host: About the guns, then? Is somebody complaining
about the guns?
Police: No, the noise.
Host: Oh, the noise. Well that makes sense because
there are no guns or drugs here. (An enormous
explosion is heard in the background.) Or
fireworks. Who's complaining about the noise?
The neighbours?
Police: No, the neighbours fled to the coast
hours ago. Most of the recent
complaints have come from Marysville.
Do you think you could ask the host to
quiet things down?
Host: No problem. (At this point, a Volkswagon bug
with primitive religious symbols drawn on the
doors emerges from the living room and roars
down the hall, past the police onto the lawn,
where it smashes into a tree. Eight ONB members
tumble out onto the grass, moaning.) See?
Things are starting to wind down.